Random Rantings of a Sarcastic Poet » homework

cravingoxygen — Thu, 15 May 2008 19:13:00 +0000

Long time no see…Hey. So… had a big IT test today. Got 59/61. After going to bed at half past eleven last night. School just never lets up, does it? Got a huge Accounting project, Science test, Science homework, Maths homework (Which I better do…), a summary about muscle tissue for Biology, Afrikaans test, LO test… *Sigh*

So the guy I like is officially gone now. He came to say goodbye today. For the last time. At least he looked really happy to see me. And he told me a couple of days ago that I have beautiful eyes.

My aunt and uncle are here. They were just relating the romantic story of how they met. Sometimes I wonder whether I will ever meet the right guy. Whether he even exists.
/me shrugs

And then I met this girl online. She’s currently the girlfriend of a guy who ‘adopted’ me as his sister online. The problem is, that she is totally in love with him. But she has been through some really horrible things in her life before and doesn’t want to get hurt again. Even worse, he hasn’t shown his face online for more than a week now… apparently his pc broke. And to make it worse… she declared her love for him in rl. He said that he loved her in rl too. But then his pc broke… and even though he said that he would be back by Monday, it’s Thursday and we still haven’t seen him. And then on top of this, this girl knows really mean people who do things to her that they have absolutely no right to do.
And the only thing that I can do about it is to be there for her when she needs a virtual hug or to rant or cry with or at someone. This girl has become like a sister to me and I can’t stand seeing her hurt the way that she is now. If I could just take all her hurt away, even if I had to have it, I would do it. I just can’t stand not being able to do something like this. At least, I hope I’m making a difference by being there for her. She once told me that my email made her smile the whole day and another time that I’m the friend she always needed, but never had. I hope that I’m at least making a dent in helping her somehow.

Last night was really scary. You see, my stepmom is in hospital for an operation and we went to visit. And I was just having these flashbacks. You see, my mom was a kidney patient, so she was in hospital regularly. Which meant that we were there to visit her regularly. Which means that I can find my way around pretty much any hospital seeing as I spent a large part of my primary school life in them.
So anyway… wherever we went, there were like stuff that reminded me so much of myself a couple of years back. There were like these really cute kids with their grandparents, waiting for who knows what; the typical image of me and my sister with our grandparents waiting for my mom a couple of years back.
And hospitals always seem to have these type of couches that look really pretty, but are way overstuffed and aren’t really comfortable at all. Well, we always used to sit on those playing with our parent’s cellphones while they talked. And of course the hospital was tiled. Like the hospital my mom was in when she taught us hop-scotch on the tiles. And there was the freaking pharmacy with boxes of practical jokes for sale on the counter. It was just really unsettling. And the hospital was in Pretoria, same as the one my mom was in.
I was quiet all the way back home. It’s like this just stirred up all those memories that I don’t even know whether I want or not. At times, it’s like I just want to forget it all, but I know that I can’t and somewhere deep inside I know that I don’t want to. Then I wouldn’t be me, I guess. Call me lame and emo if you want.
It was all just so tragic.

So. I still have Science to study and Maths and Bio to do. So I’ll go run a bubble bath and go sit there with my Science textbook. Then I’ll finish my summary and go to bed. Hopefully before 10:30. Over and out…

Your Local Bubble-Bath-Wanting Sarcastic Poet

cravingoxygen — Sat, 19 Apr 2008 15:43:00 +0000

Hey six big fat zerosSorry I haven’t posted for a while, it’s been hectic. So, I did the IT project till about 12 the night before it was due. Yeah, I know, Student’s Syndrome. Then I lay awake till about 2, crying. I think it was a mixture of exhaustion, PMS and stress. Needless to say, the next morning it looked like my eyes had gone shopping the night before and I had to scramble like crazy to get rid of the worst of the bags. I was really tired for the rest of the day, even though the rest of the day was cool.

We started with assembly, which was actually interesting for a change, then a free of which I bunked about half. Then Science for which we were supposed to go upstairs to the computer classroom and do the work which the teacher had left for us (Since she had gone early), but it was really full and there weren’t enough chairs, so most of the Science students bunked and sat in the empty English class to work. The computer teacher didn’t even notice, lol.

After that Bio, during which I didn’t make any plans to overthrow the government, democracy or the free world the way I normally do, since I was too tired. Then double maths but, since the teacher wasn’t there, the maths literacy class was also there, which was dope. We sat in the front and they sat at the back. I started waking up roundabout then. At second break I realized that I was actually hungry (since I hadn’t eaten for the whole day) and had my lunch. Then we had English which I managed to bunk most of by making photocopies. We have an oral to do in which one of us has to be a character and the other conducts an interview. *Stifle the yawn please* Then we got dismissed early since the Accounting teacher wasn’t there, which means that we were hanging around the school for a good hour.

Then the guy that I like and I went to IT. We handed in our projects and had the lesson. My mom was late, though, so I got to walk around the school and chat with him for almost twenty minutes with a good excuse. He still regards me as his sister, though and freaking asks my advice. Still. *Sigh*

Then I role-played till about half past one (yes, in the morning). I’ve met this really nice guy and my character is going out with him. Last night we went on a double date and then he took me to this cute little kazibo to chat. He is so sweet. He, like, got his friends to make sure that no-one bothered us and everything. Not as though it helped, though. Some guy still nothered us. They killed him for it. He’ll be okay, don’t worry.

Today I went to the zoo, since my parents are trying to get me away from the computer and my own company lol. We saw tons of animals and now my feet hurt. The tiger cage was really
cool. There was
a tiger standing right next to the area that we were standing in (on the other side of the fence, obviously). Then two idiots decided to hop over the closed off area and go stand right in front of the tiger. Two really hot idiots. Unfortunately, they’re goths. I’m not really into goths, though I do think that they’re seriously hot.

I’ve decided to pray for them both. Every day. But anyway… so we were buying refreshments when I saw this girl. She was looking at me, so I smiled at her. She smiled back and then kept looking at me. After a while, she and her friend came towards me. Now me, being the
idiot that I
sometimes tend to be, had taken The Lord of the Rings with me. lol. It turns out that she loves books and we ended up exchanging numbers. So how’s that for socializing… talking to a complete stranger. Take that ya’ll shrinks.

We’re about to go watch a movie. Then I’ll probably roleplay some more with me character’s special friend… lol. Oh well, sweet dreams.

Your Socially-Adept-for-a-Change and Sarcastic Poet

cravingoxygen — Fri, 11 Apr 2008 19:41:00 +0000

Hey all you people who I know aren’t reading this
I don’t know what I’d do if someone did actually read this. I’d like totally freak out. Since the hit counter is still an exclusive hangout for zeros only.

I did about half of my bio homework today. The rest can wait for now. I’m trying to go to bed early tonight since I have to get my sleeping pattern right for school again. Since, right now, I’m going to bed at 1 or 2 and getting up at 10. I should be getting up at half past six (in the morning) on school days so I better start sleeping more.
I heard the coolest phrase today, Craving oxygen. That would make such a brilliant poem. If only I could remember where I heard it… ah! I remember. One of Hilary Duff’s songs, I think. Don’t know its name. But anyway.School on Monday! I’m actually looking forward to it. Not the whole getting up early, homework or exams part, but I do miss my friends. My Mondays are pretty cool, since I start the day with two free periods, lol. And then double Afrikaans, which is a breeze. But no Maths. And there is English :yuck: But anyway. I wonder what the others have been doing. I hope the guy I like is coming back, with him you never know. I have to get the Age of Empires cd and Pride and Prejudice from Nomsa. I better make a mental note of that somewhere or something.
List of things to do:
1. Check school uniform
2. Practice piano
3. Check stationery
4. Finish all homework except bio and IT
5. Finish IT and bio by Friday
6. Check when bio is actually due for (since I forgot or didn’t write it down)
7. Call IT teacher for help with project

That’s it, I think.

Oh yeah and 8. Go through music theory
and
9. Try to convince parents not to send you to music portfolio at Kempton High during free periods NBNBNBNBNBNBNBNBNB

That’s the final list.
/me sighs in relief

I’m not suffering from that rare strain of boredom anymore. *Whew!* I wouldn’t have survived it much longer. I am now in a more active, I-better-start-doing-my-homework-now mood, which is infinitely preferable. Call me a nerd if you like. Rather do it now than at 12 on Sunday night.

Right now, I feel like a panda bear. A panda has to eat all day long because otherwise he starves since the food that he eats is so ‘unnourishing’ and he’s so big. Normally, eating is pretty enjoyable, but not to a panda. He has to because he has to. I’m feeling like that now. There are all these things which might have been enjoyable once upon a time, but right now, I have to do them because I have to.

I’m trying to do some maths by mail, so that I can start with college or university maths while still in matric. That would be really cool. Then I could
make the guy that I really like from my Maths class jealous, lol. And infuriate the maths teacher. This has serious possibilities…
This bears no relation to the last paragraph. I’m doing this beause I want to.It will be cool to see all my friends again. I really miss them and all their craziness. They’re the crazy ones and I’m the down to earth one. Together, we make a pretty good team, I think. I hope Agnes passed Mathematics. If she didn’t and gets put down to Maths Literacy, I will personally kill her. She is really bright enough to do well, she just doesn’t work. I hope Garreth passed.

And even though she’s like my rival, I hope Robynne passed and starts getting her act together again. Robynne is a really smart girl who dances at international competitions. Right now, she’s like in the top half of the top ten in the world for like two or three types of dancing. She’s really organized and nice and smart, but she’s putting too much pressure on herself. She’s stressing herself out because she isn’t getting the marks she used to, while mine stay reasonably the same.

(My friends say I should stop working so hard and give them a chance, lol. Apparently, I set the standard too high. And I’m not bragging, I’m writing this down because no-one is going to read this anyway).

She’s putting way too much pressure on herself. She doesn’t ever relax. Sh’es always working during free periods, she’s taking all the hard subjects at school as well as an extra one outside of school. She never gets together with her friends, she doesn’t read, she doesn’t watch tv or browse the net. I don’t think she does anything for fun or even has a hobby. Apart from dancing. But that doesn’t count since she keeps pressurizing herself to do well there too. She needs to learn to chill.

The more she stresses, the more she makes herself suffer and the worse she does and the cycle continues. She’s a goody-two-shoes, but she’s nice enough and I hope that she figures out how to get it together again soon. She was crying before her biology test because she couldn’t finish studying.

But for the love of crying out loud! The girl goes straight to dancing after school and only gets home at like 8 or 9. Then she still has to do homework, eat and sleep. And study. She often gets up at, like 3 in the morning to study. Which is really stupid if you’re writing maths. If you have a choice between studying and getting enough sleep before a maths test (and if you’re doing well in class and get the work) you should go for the sleep option. The bright spark got up at like 2 in the morning to study for maths and then wonders why she almost flunked. She keeps saying ‘But I know the work, I got up at half past two to study it.’ Which just totally proves my point. She should rather have slept since she knows what she’s doing. But she won’t listen to me. Anyway… good luck to her.

Well, good night now. I’ll keep ya’ll empty space posted about the big guild meeting tomorrow.

Your local Sarcastic Poet

cravingoxygen — Thu, 10 Apr 2008 21:19:00 +0000

Hey allI don’t know why I even bother writing as though there is someone reading this, since my
really nice hit counter still has lot’s of big fat zeros in it. Oh well.

Today I started by convincing myself to do some of my Biology. That’s how desperate I was. I did the easiest part. I didn’t feel like reading or piano or planeshift. I’ve been off planeshift for the past couple
of days. You see, you’re only supposed to do, like 3 quests at a time. Maximum. But, since many are still glitchy, I have, like nine or ten open. The problem is, that they trip each other up. And I’ve travelled for like an hour to get to this place to finish a quest, but the freaking thing trips up!!! I’ll make peace with it on Saturday and try a few other ways. I’ll have to since our guild’s big meeting is then. 12:00 GMT, 15:00 my time.

So there. Now that’s off my chest.

Having nothing better to do, I made some more cables and I have now earned R109. Which might actually buy a decent book. After making those, Leon threw me out. Apparently he wanted to make an ‘important call.’ Yeah right. Anyway, he was bored for the rest of the day and chilled with me in my room.
He had so much work last night that he was supposed to take some home to finish, but instead of working, he went to a raid on World of Warcraft. They were, like, 3 people and they totally wasted the Horde! Like 400 – 480 kills! By three people! So then he had to work till like 3 in the morning. lol. Serves him right.
He says he’ll ask his friend, the really smart single one, to copy World of Warcraft for me so that I can play too. That would be really cool. I’ve browsed it, and I’ve decided that if I were to play, I’d be a Blood Elf Mage. That would be really cool.

I’ve been listening to this brilliant song, Love is Wicked. The poetry in there is amazing. It uses gorgeous imagery. I quote:

Running around I just can’t get through my day
Thoughts of you just keep consuming me
I thought I could do it but now I see
That you’re not mine and I was wrong to think you’d change

And then some more:

Tears on my pillow ’cause your love is wicked
Cry me a river ’cause your love is wicked
Friends come around say your love is wicked
But the kisses what you get, don’t you know it’s wickedWhat must I go do to get over you
Anybody have a remedy or a cure?
Someone call a doctor or emergency crew
‘Cause me carry feeling for you, for you

That’s just some of it. It’s gorgeous though. That line ‘Cry me a river ’cause your love is wicked’ just captures what she must feel like so perfectly. I’m not going to analyze it any further though, I do enough of that in English. Which I’m going back to on Monday.*sigh*

I don’t feel like half a broken easter egg with my hole of an inside showing any more. Now it’s more like a boredom that’s not there because you don’t have anything to do, it’s there because you have so much that you should do and tons that you can do, but you don’t feel like doing any of it. I wonder what that can be compared to.
…
…
…
Oh who cares. You catch my drift anyway.

I wonder what I’m gonna do with my money. I could buy a book. I could save up for a new motherboard. I could buy a big bag of biltong with it. I could buy a stack of books at a second-hand bookshop. I could pay off may library fine. I could save it. Naaah. Never mind that last one. I think I’ll take the second-hand bookshop option. Unless some more suddenly materializes. Which I sort of doubt. Wait! I could always buy the HitchHiker’s Guide to the Galaxy.

Why is it that the first star that you see isn’t the brightest? I mean, if it wasn’t the brightest, why is it the first that you see? Oh well. Maybe I’ll right some more on this subject later.

I know what I want to do. I’ll read some good science fiction while I listen to some depressing love songs.

You know what really sucks? Having a guy that you totally love, but he doesn’t know it. Also, there are tons of reasons that it won’t work. I am totally head over heels for this one guy in my class. He is brilliant at Mathematics. And science when he wants to be. He’s really nice too. There are tons of problems though.
First of all, he’s black and I’m white. I don’t discriminate, but there is no way that my parents will even consider letting me go out with him. And I really don’t want to do it behind their back.
Secondly, my friends are really strict about the fact that you shouldn’t go out with your friend’s ex.
Thirdly, he’s a really great guy and I don’t want to risk it that this doesn’t work out and that our friendship is messed up.
Fourthly he regards me as his sister. You can see that in the way that he hugs me (no I’m not a stalker). He hugs his girlfriend in a certain way, his friends that are girls in a certain way and his friends that are girls but are so close that they’re practically his sisters in a different way. I’m in the last category.
Fifth(ly?): we once had this conversation regarding whether or not you would date your friends. Guess what he said. So there is no way, since he totally considers me his freaking sister from another mother.
Sixth, he has a girlfriend. And what’s worse, is that he comes to me for advice when things between aren’t what they should be. And in the meantime, I’m freaking in love with him. At least I do a good job of hiding it, I guess.

On the other hand, we have like almost all of our classes together. We even take IT as an extra subject after school together. We are freaking inseperable in Maths class. I sit on the one side of the class and he sits on the other side. Whenever we have work to do, though, we are constantly at each other’s desks. The teacher actually asked us why we don’t just sit together and stop bothering the rest by walking around. lol. Whenever we’re revising, she makes us sit at the back together so that we don’t start gesturing at each other across the class when we get inspiration. lol.
Also, he really does care about me. Listen to this, it’s so sweet. Don’t tell my parents, though, they’d freak.

All my friends consider me really sweet and innocent. I don’t drink, but not for the reasons they think. It’s not that I don’t like it, or that I’m too scared and/or innocent, or that I’m not allowed to or anything. It’s just that I have to make a stand for my prinsciples in some way and by not getting drunk when the rest of them are, I do that. I’m the one who you can always trust at a party, because I don’t drink. It’s just a lot easier not to get yourself drunk if you don’t drink at all, rather than to try to only drink responsibly. Not that I mind alcohol, but if I start drinking now, they’d regard it as me giving up my prinsciples. So, I don’t drink.
They don’t know all this though.
They’re just really nice about it and since I am probably the most innocent of all of them and they’re really nice, they’re forever trying their best not to get me into trouble by trying not to be late for class and helping me find my lost homework and not pressurizing me into drinking and buying cooldrink just for me when they’re having alcohol. Now the guy I like is so sweet that he even tries not to swear in front of me or play explicit songs or anything.
So now you have the background, here’s the story:

So we were, like six girls and four guys. Only three of the girls stayed for the sleepover, though. Of these the one girl, Hazel, was totally gone. She was sitting down on the floor and sulking under the tables and stuff. The guys weren’t drunk yet, they were saving themselves for the bottle of vodka that they had, but didn’t want to share with the rest of the people. Anyway, the one guy, Mimbi, mixed about quarter a glass of Red Square Blue with as much vodka and was trying to convince Hazel to down it.
My friend, Agnes and I let her taste it, but since her alcohol tolerance is really low, we took it away from her. She was really upset about it, though, as was Mbimbi. Whenever we put the glass down, one of them would take it, so I ended up carrying the stupid freaking glass around everywhere. So there I was holding this glass with fizzy, blue alcohol spiked with vodka while I was talking to one of my other friends.
Now the guy I like had been outside with his girlfriend and when he came in, he saw me holding this glass and laughing. He must have thought I was drunk. His face went like all hard and angry and asked what was in the glass and where I got it. I explained that it was Red Square Blue that Mbimbi spiked with vodka. If he wasn’t black, I swear he would’ve gone red. He was totally getting all angry and getting ready to beat the other guy, who’s like one of his best friends, up!
Maybe he was just mad that the other guy had taken out the vodka early, but on the other hand…
And he wasn’t drunk, in case you’re wondering. He actually drinks responsibly. He’s the only
one of the other guys who weren’t drunk later that night.
He’s really sweet. He’s probably the only person that I can actually have an intelligent conversation with in the whole class. No offense to anyone else. They’re all really great, but not into computers or maths.

So you tell me, do we stand a chance? Don’t answer that.

Okay. My soppy lovestruck moment is over. Thank goodness no-one is actually reading this.

Your local Sarcastic and apparently lovestruck Poet